{"id":2203,"date":"2018-10-25T18:59:16","date_gmt":"2018-10-25T22:59:16","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/blacksmite.com\/?p=2203"},"modified":"2018-11-07T11:21:48","modified_gmt":"2018-11-07T16:21:48","slug":"halloweens-creepy-sleepy-society-of-bumkin-heads","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/dynorex.com\/Hokumspew\/index.php\/brainsalad\/halloweens-creepy-sleepy-society-of-bumkin-heads\/","title":{"rendered":"Halloween’s Creepy Sleepy Society of Bumkin Heads"},"content":{"rendered":"

Greedy Banker Premature Foreclosure Notice\u00a0Slinger Costume by: Cripple Regret Lancewear<\/strong><\/p>\n

Look no further, we have the costume of the century! Yes now everyone, young and old can dress to the hilt and fantasize about being a “Greedy Banker.” Just think of the fear you will generate as you comb the streets, looking for a door to knock on. And you can bet your Grandmother’s crystal that is already sitting in the local pawn shop, when they open that door, they will scurry in fear, letting you\u00a0grab all the treats you want, guaranteed! Just remember, even if they are brave enough to stand there and face you, all you have to do is quick draw the foreclosure papers from your custom foreclosure holster which\u00a0guarantees to\u00a0drop them\u00a0to their knees, cowering and cringing like blind little puppet slaves ready to serve you all the hokum your teeth can stand before they rot and fall out of your skull. The perfect costume for your little brainwashed goblins\u00a0so they can gleefully aspire to be another monetary bullying greedy brain stomping\u00a0capitalist. Greed knows no bounds and the fear that these costumes will generate will guarantee you and your brainwashed offspring a\u00a0golden path to decadence and debauchery. Not even the Holy scriptures could predict such a horror that is truly owned by the 1 percent of society, at least in spirit!<\/p>\n

Ravenous CEO Rape and Plunder Small Business Costume by: Wolf Gorging<\/strong><\/p>\n

Is your game rape? Plunder? Well we have just the costume for you! Why not dress like the latest and greatest CEO? Yes, if you aspire to climb that corporate capitalistic ladder, then there is no better way to prepare yourself then dressing the part and scaring the bejesus out of all the local small business owners by knocking on their doors, showing them your\u00a0plundering plans to open a\u00a0 franchise chain store across the street that will bankrupt them in 6 to 8 months guaranteed! After which you can hire them to clean the toilets and shine your shoes, possibly scrub your floors for minimum wage. Just think, you can have both the husband and wife, possibly their offspring, cooking your meals, doing your laundry, providing cheap entertainment, the works! So, when they open the door seeing your little tykes dressed in this costume, they will\u00a0immediately bow and kiss their feet in compliance hoping when they finally \u00a0bankrupt them,\u00a0they will have mercy upon their souls and allow\u00a0them to serve\u00a0the dynasty\u00a0for eternity. Or at least until a larger greedy capitalistic corporation swallows that corporation whole. Remember, this costume is educational and is approved by your local school board as a fun way to learn how to become a brainwashed pawn to successfully keep capitalism on top, keeping the 1 percent of society\u00a0pathetically rich. As an added bonus, it comes with programmed audio sound effects of voices\u00a0tyrannically bitching out your slave driven employees to work just a little harder to receive a penny raise or the privilege to climb under the boss’s desk!<\/p>\n

Kardassian I am so Dammed Popular and Rich Bully Costume by: Star Defiled<\/strong><\/p>\n

Perhaps you were, as a child, a class bully or simply from a wealthy family that all the teachers\u00a0 favored and allowed special privileges simply because your were so dammed special! Well, why let it end there, especially when your current offspring are all losers? Just dress them up in\u00a0this provocative costume, Kardassian! Yes they will certainly intimidate anyone foolish\u00a0enough to open their doors this Halloween, having them\u00a0 bow in subordinary awe to these rich royal specters of the night!\u00a0Kiss their royal sash, and be careful not to drool upon their ambient greatness and be grateful that they have graced your household\u00a0\u00a0with their celebrity god-like resonance. Being dressed as the ultimate role models of\u00a0the high society, you will feel the influence as everyone you encounter will want to be just like you, to be greedy, just like you, because you are dressed as the divine of civilization, promoting alternate lifestyles as acceptable and moral as defined by the\u00a0rich, whom you will represent while dressed in this costume of\u00a0the upper crusty, boorish class.\u00a0So go ahead and dress up today as a Kardassian! Buy this costume now and get a\u00a0“Jruce Benner Costume” absolutely free for that inspiring tyke of yours that realized before puberty, he really wanted to be female! Makeup and jewelry not included.<\/p>\n

Money Store Loan Shark Stalking Costume by: A Fish Called You<\/strong><\/p>\n

Perhaps you are better at breaking things, like limbs of deadbeats unable to pay their loans? If that is the case, then this is the costume for you, “Money Store Loan Shark.” As you\u00a0 slime your way through the evening down the unsuspecting deadbeat’s street, you can be sure their lights will be off when you come knocking. So what do you do then? You just break their doors down and find the little slime balls in their hiding spots.\u00a0Once found, you just\u00a0adjust their kneecaps with your baseball bat (included). If that don’t get an agreement to pay, then you can put on the brass knuckles (included) and adjust their jaw! Be sure however, not to break their writing hand’s fingers and bones to be sure they can sign once they agree to sell their soul to you. If all else fails, then you can pull your snub-nosed 38 (extra) and ventilate their skull, spraying their grey matter all over the closet wall. You can be sure once the word spreads through that neighborhood, the next collection will be a breeze! So, no need for harassing phone calls or wasting paper on warning letters. This costume is the sure fire way to strike fear into everyone, because let’s face it, everyone In the suburbs owes money. Act now and get a free demolition and arson kit to make prime examples of those extra hard collections, getting money from single mothers, elderly people, welfare families and politicians.<\/p>\n

\u201cTex\u201d oNid ittEnEbEd (sHow nO mErcY)<\/p>\n

\u00a9 Copyright: dYnoReX and ADGMusic\/Soft\/Literature Org All rights reserved 2018<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Greedy Banker Premature Foreclosure Notice\u00a0Slinger Costume by: Cripple Regret Lancewear Look no further, we have the costume of the century! Yes now everyone, young and old can dress to the hilt and fantasize about being a “Greedy Banker.” Just think of the fear you will generate as you comb the streets, looking for a door … <\/p>\n

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