The Donald Trump Sleazy Grifter Costume by: Horn-e Clown
Before the election, you may be wondering what ever could a young conservative wear for that socially distanced Halloween Party, to look your best, virtually. Yes, a red white and blue pinstriped dress shirt accompanied by a “Hang ’em High” neck tie, red white or blue (optional), just in case Trump loses the election and you get too depressed to continue under liberal rule. Gray tweed jacket, loosely fitting, so no one will notice how fat and greedy you are, with plenty of pockets to stash all the hokum you can steal door to door, pretending your hokum collection bag is empty and in need of more. You also get black nylon pants (stretchy) so it will mold over your blubbery legs, making you look semi fit as you present your slogans of lies and deceit to anyone stupid enough to listen and not slam the door in your face this Halloween. If that happens, just wedge the door with your shiny black dress shoes with a perma-shine gleam (included) allowing you to see your face reflecting, as to stroke your ego, specially designed to emit a thin semblance of your not so sleek face and body, equipped with a steel shank and toe to avoid getting your foot broken (steel shank and toe optional). And how can we forget the mask, black in color, with a patriot design of the American flag, imbued over the confederate flag, with upside down pentagrams, all on top of a big fat greedy elephant (included), or a mask displaying Hilary Clinton barefoot and pregnant, chained to a stove with a dog collar around her neck, scrubbing a floor with a scrub brush (optional). So don’t delay, reserve your order tonight before the “2020 USA Election Creep Show” and get your Warp Speed vaccine absolutely risk free created by bought off scientists who will guarantee to hide all the side effects! Cause, not knowing is like, ignorance is bliss!
Sleepy Joe Biden Globalized Dementia Wizard Costume by: Aquascrotum
Not withstanding all of the so called leftists riots, and so called BLM and Antifa movements, that were created and controlled by the CIA and other intelligence groups, to cover up the real reasons for the riots like, wealth inequality and the pandemic shutdown, which by design, was created solely to hurt the middle class and mom and pop shops, you now can dress like a Sleepy, globally bought off, dementia stricken, impotent wizard puppet this Halloween, getting yourself psyched up to illusively win a useless election (mainly because both left and right are owned by the globalists), campaigning door to door for some good old hokum. It comes complete with a crimson wizard cloak and hoodie (Or an optional floppy pointed wizard’s hat), a tall petrified plastic staff with a mini 5 G antenna on the top, shaped like the Eye of Horus, cute wooden wizard shoes, or glass slippers (optional) so you can click your heals three times to escape to your limo (optional), just incase a riot breaks out in the neighborhood you are trick or treating. And of course, it would not be complete without that 5 G element wizard ring so you can mesmerize those foolish enough to open their doors this Halloween, to mail in their election votes, remaining safe at home from a fictitious virus that is fictitiously deadly, at the same time, allowing you to mail their vote document for them, seeing you will be walking right by the local mail box on your way to the next house to trick or treat! Optionally, it comes with a portable directional steamer, whiteout and a multi color ballpoint pen so you can alter the votes while walking to the mail box! And the mask, which is also red and displays a picture of a ball gag so nobody will ask you to explain why you sound like you just had a stroke. These costumes are going quick so reserve yours today! Order before midnight of the “2020 USA Election Creep Show” and get your “You will not be turned into a toad” guarantee when you’re forced into taking a vaccine! (Conditions apply)
The Howie (Meeker) Hawkins Greeny Slimeball Depopulation Guidestone Costume by: Turpentine Smear
Why dress like a tree hugger this year when the depopulation agenda of the elite is sure to bring us all into the next apocalypse! Because the Green party has a couple of seats in Canada, means Howie is really a hockey fan in disguise, because all he can really do is covet all Canada’s trees and their potential use for bio-fuel. Everyone knows secretly that the environmentalists are the reason for depopulation so, why not dress like a “de-populist”. Yes, the costume starts off with the vest, made of simulated leather of course, as to adhere to ALM, Animal Lives Matter, studded with magnetic heavy metal studs, sure to attract any or all of the 5 G millimeter waves being emitted about, and 1960’s simulated leather frills, sleeveless of course, to show off your pink sheltered skin, being penetrated by 5 G millimeter waves small enough to enter you skin cells, creating exosomes that resemble that particular unidentified popular virus! The pants will be a simulated lawn material, shaggy and rustic looking, because of PLM, Plant Lives Matter, followed by the sixty-ish simulated sandals made from bio-factory approved vinyl that lasts for at least 6000 years before it will actually decompose. And this whole assemble would not be complete without a dog collar featuring horned 5 G antennas, all around, useful when you wander out of sector, enabling your head to explode unless you get back to your sector, quickly! This collar is also useful for censorship especially if someone complains during their undetermined length of stay in the local detainment camps, shocking them to, shut the hell up! We won’t even explain possible trick or treating scenarios because, no one in their right mind will answer their door when you come knocking, dressed in this costume this Halloween. Thus, no need for a mask which would most likely be embroidered assorted simulated leaves, featuring a picture of the Georgia guides stones! Act now and get your “kill me last” guarantee when the actual depopulation commences!
The Jo Jorgensen G-Girl Home Front Assault Costume By: A-Dream
How much money could be saved if you just defended your own property instead of paying so many taxes for an army, navy, air force or marines? A whole dung load, so send them all home and concentrate on our own home fronts, or just our own personal spaces. Yes, and Jo-Jo can show us all how to dress conservatively and carry a “BFG, a Big Frigging Gun”. This costume starts with black silky cotton mixed slacks, pleated just so, and tight around the ankles, as to display the rose and thorn tat on your ankle, dripping blood, tastefully. The shoes are stilettos of course simulating small ammunition barrels for the heals, silky gun black in color, open toe design with brass military clasps ensuring a snug secure fit. The top is also black and dark gray in color, tweed and mohair, for that warm and tough feminine look, soft to touch, but don’t piss her off when holding a gun, disposition. It comes also with 38 bullet necklace, sterling silver, or 24 carat gold; gun powdered perfume is extra. And all of this is accented by long chrome fingernails, epoxy fitted, guaranteed not to fall off when ripping somebody’s heart out. Optionally, it comes with a coat hanger for those close emergency abortion encounters. It also comes with the howitzer holster, highly polished black leather, enabling you to adjust its capacity to fit a customer provided small 38 revolver, or a large anti-aircraft gun, depending on your mood. The earrings are 5 G guidance modules for the potential missile launcher attachment (extra), pyramid in shape, that rotate, doubling as sonar/radar detectors that can be viewed on your iPad or smart phone, using the provided software. The mask would be a patriot color, red white or blue, with the slogan, “People may kill people, but my big frigging gun will!” So for all the hokum you can carry, bring a BFB, big frigging bag, because when they open the door this Halloween and get a load of you, they will give up all their candy while pleading, “don’t kill me” and lock up tight when you leave, never to open their doors again, at least until next election.
“Tex” oNid ittEnEbEd (sHow nO mErcY) © Copyright: dYnoReX and ADGMusic/Soft/Literature Org All rights reserved 2020