Application to Madness (Corporate Employment Dictatorship)

Equal Opportunity Spoiler

I recently applied for a position in a certain large industrial fabrication corporation looking for continuity testers. I was optimistic about this position because the position was a union job which would of commanded a respectable wage. I surprisingly got an interview and they said they would have a “small test” included (exact words). I dug up my old college books, found some practice tests that simulated similar test questions related to this sort of position. Having the correct college background for this vocation, I figured it would be a shoe in for me and was fairly confident, even though I had 2 days to study in preparation for the test.

Because they said “short test”, I was not too worried about the test itself, however, I have been caught like that before, not being prepared with my mind “in gear”, for that type of scrutiny. Thus I studied for hours, until I was scoring 90 to 100 % on the practice testing. So I was ready, and was very confident as I approached the interview time, and thought I had absolutely nothing to lose. Was I wrong? Dammed right I was wrong. I mean, you cannot trust corporate logic to do the predictable. But you can certainly trust them to do the underhanded and ambiguous.

So I went to the interview. I was 15 minutes early. The interviewers were 15 minutes late. I was not impressed. I do not think that has ever happened. At least not to me, and I have been to many interviews of all types, for many different vocations. Never did I wait more then 5 minutes to get into the interview. Because it was at 10:00 am, I figured they were on a coffee break. But, they certainly have nothing to prove. They can get away with anything, because they are the “interviewers”.

Don’t Worry, All you Need is a Time Machine to Finish the Test!

So they hit me with the standard interview type questions, trying to trip me up, but I was composed and prepared thus aced through that part of the interview. At the end, they said it was time for the test, so they flopped a schematic binder on the table in front of me, along 3 different electrical/electronic components, and a fluke voltmeter(All part of the test). They handed over a 5 page test and said “you have 15 minutes”. Now, anyone in their right mind would of said “you are joking, right?”. But being a moron, I tried to do the test.

I completed the first page, and a couple of questions on the next page, but the time was up. I knew I messed up some of the questions I did complete, and was sure it was an instant failure. They said that no one completes the test. Really? And then it dawned on me. Just tell the “preferred” applicants what is on the test, provided they even have to do the test. But at that point, my hopes were completely shattered. I put on my coat and left. I cannot explain the lowness I felt leaving that building. But, what do you expect from interviewers that barely know the interviewing position. It is obvious they were looking for experience (even though the job ad did not state this). Clearly, my resume showed that I had zero experience, so why even ask me to the interview?

My Master Wrote Me a Quota!

Quotas. They need to interview a certain amount of people off the street (to satisfy that pain in the ass human rights organization and give the appearance they are an equal opportunity employer). Thus setting them up to fail, giving them (HR) the opportunity (unbeknown to the head corporate office) to squeeze in their family members and buddies before anyone else (which gives you an idea how disconnected those overpaid, corporate office CEOs, and executives are to the branch offices). If you dispute this, then you are obviously related to some one that hired you. If the test is impossible to pass, or even get 50%, and you complain that they discriminated you in some way, they can say, “no, he failed the entrance test”. Of course, they would not admit to the ridiculous time limit to do the lengthy test. Now most of you may say, “companies all have policies against hiring relatives”. Well you can live that illusion if you like, because it is just a policy. In other words, if you believe that, I have some swamp land I would love to sell you.

I Would be Happy to Kneel Under your Desk, Master!

Now, this also sets you up further, if by some miracle they still want to hire you, because you will be in total shock that they are actually giving you the position . Thus, you will be their total corporate slut, at least for the first 3 months anyway, snivelling and grovelling, basically kissing their corporate asses until your lips get gangrene. And that, my friends, is exactly how they want their corporate slaves, err, employees to act. Like little whining, subordinate maggots, bowing down to kiss their royal, corporate anuses. And the most hilarious thing is, the interviewers, (HR) do not have a clue, but because they want to keep their cushy, overpaid positions, and squeeze in their relatives, will not question the ridiculous interview methods, dictated to them (HR), to inflict.

Land of the Grave, Home of the Bereaved

Corporate North America has the worst reputation in the world for employers. It used to be the other way around, but now, it is reversed. If you really looked at the big picture in the last 25 years, how corporate North America has basically cut the throats of the blue collar worker, the backbone of society, and how these victims and their families have fallen from grace. Unemployment, bankruptcy, homelessness, prostitution, substance abuse, alcoholism, murder, fraud, theft, larceny, human trafficking, etc., all by-products of corporate commercial North America’s greedy, capitalistic nightmare orchestrated by the wealthy and the 1 percenters. Why are the 1 percenters so hell bent on turning North America into the “New Third World Continent”?

Because they are “pigs” in the true sense of the word. They have no concept of justice or sharing. They are so greedy that generation after generation are just taught to be more greedy, clutching on to there insane fortunes, devising brand new ways to screw the common person over and over again, keeping their pockets full of money, while your grandparents starve in a under funded old folks home. Is that your fate? Let us hope not. Be optimistic. But wait, that is exactly what the 1 percenters want you to be, so you will be blinded to their hands rummaging through your pockets one last time, trying to steal your last few pennies you managed to keep from their clutches thus far.

“Tex” oNid ittEnEbEd (sHow nO mErcY)

Originally Published on November 30, 2015

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